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Office Humor
Best Things to say if Caught Sleeping At Your Desk...
"They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
"This is just a 15 minute power-nap as described in that time management
course you sent me."
"Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out You probably got here just
in time!"
"I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and
envisioning a new paradigm."
"I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."
"I was doing Yoga exercises to relieve work-related stress."
"Damn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to
our biggest problem."
"The coffee machine is broken..."
"Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..."
" ... in Jesus' name. Amen."
You know you work in Corporate America in the 90's if...
You sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different
companies.
You worked for the same company for 4 years and sat at more than 10
different desks.
You've been in the same job for 4 years and have had 10 different
managers.
You order your business cards in "half orders" instead of whole boxes.
When someone asks about what you do for a living, you can't explain it
in one sentence.
You get really excited about a 2% pay raise.
You use acronyms in your sentences.
Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose your best jokes.
You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.
It's dark when you drive to and from work.
Fun is when issues are assigned to someone else.
The word "opportunity" makes you shiver in fear.
You see a good looking person and know it is a visitor.
Free food left over from meetings is your main staple.
Weekends are those days your significant other makes you stay home.
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