Not All Friendships Are Alike

Friendships, like fine wine, come in many different varieties. In the wine world you can enjoy a rich Merlot, a complex Cabernet Sauvignon, a bold Chardonnay, or a delicate Champagne. The same is true of friendship. You can have a steadfast best friend, a trusted close friend, an engaging casual friend or even an acquaintance you enjoy talking to from time to time.

As you've discovered from your own personal definition of a friend, finding one person who can completely satisfy all of what you require from friendship is not easy. However, by having several different friends of various types, you don't have to depend on one person to fill all your friendship needs.

The Best Friend

When there is a discussion about the joys of friendship, the best friend is the type of friendship most people have in mind. The best friend is usually someone who knows you almost as well as you know yourself (in some instances, even better). The best friend is a confidant who knows your deepest, darkest secrets and has discovered your major flaws, but still loves you anyway. Of course it goes without saying that the feeling is mutual.

Neither time, distance, arguments, nor adversity seem able to sour your relationship with your best friend. As wonderful as it is, this is not the easiest type of friendship relationship to develop. Most people only have one best friend in a lifetime. However, it is well worth the effort required to build and keep a best friend.

The Close Friend

Most people have more than one close friend. These are the people you “hang out” with on a fairly regular basis. You might not share your most personal secrets with your close friends, but you trust them with a good portion of your innermost self. You share many different activities with your close friends, from vacations to simple phone calls. Close friends are highly valuable. Just as in is the case with best friends, the effort put into your relationship with your close friends is also time well spent.

The Casual Friend

Casual friends are usually your activity buddies. The time you spend with them is usually centered around a specific activity, hobby or sport. The people in your book club might be considered your casual friends. You generally only associate with them when it’s related to the book club, but you all know each other quite well. Casual Friends are also very valuable. The more casual friends you have the merrier. They will help keep a lot of variety in your life.

Acquaintances

Acquaintances abound. Your co-workers, the green grocer who always has a kind word to say, your neighbors. Don't dismiss them as unimportant. Having aquaintences can give you a good sense of "belonging". Don't you feel more a part of your neighborhood when people know you and you know them, even if its just to say hello when you see each other at the bustop in the morning?

Nothing Is Set In Stone

Of course there’s a grey area in practically every situation in life. You might find it difficult to define the relationship you have with your friends, or perhaps you can add more friendship varieties to this list. That’s fine. As a matter of fact, you can define your own friendship categories.

Not only are the categories not set in stone, neither are the people in them. The real beauty of friendship is that you can choose to work towards making an acquaintance a casual friend or a casual a close friend. It’s all up to you.

Friendship, like fine wine, can make “the heart rejoice”. Why not try out all the different varieties.